The fate of a woman.

The post below I made about a month or 2 ago but never published.

Funny how things change in a short amount of time. I did some things I'm not proud of, somethings out of pity and loneliness only to realize I let myself get caught up in a spiders web of tales. I was just a fly, caught in their web. I'm unstuck, grateful for the help they did give me but ready to go back to being just friends, I guess.

We woman are fickle, we don't know what we want, where we're going, what the ultimate goal is. I feel a sense of excitement at all the new people around me but also a sense of dread. What if it happens again, the lies, jealousy, betrayal? I'm making all these new connections in a world of people trying to connect. Sometimes we make good ones, bad ones... I no longer know if this initial connection was what I was looking for or if it was just me trying to mold it to my will. Them molding me to their will...

In the end it was all nothing but a distraction from reality.

I do know, I'm making another connection, something more related to what I was looking for, to what I need. I need understanding, an escape from my mundane existence but into to a world of thoughts, hopes & dreams, not games and fun. I can buy those things if I need them, what I need can not be bought, nor built, nor sold. It has no shape, no physical representation other than the people that inspire it.

In this short time I have come to understand myself a bit more, in this short amount of time.

We woman are fickle... I'll never be content.

Oh wells, such is the fate of a woman.