Pangs of Fear

I sometimes have these pangs of fear at the thought of dying...

I don't know why it happens. Its absolutely random!!! I'll be on the bus or train, admiring the view when I become aware of my mortality and then it hits me. Fear, unrelenting and cruel. I have no control of it and its terrifying.

I wish I was brave. I don't want to be afraid to live because I'm afraid of dying.

Time to start over

I quit my job, again. I can't seem to figure out where I really want to be or what I really want to do. I realized that I like making things with my hands. I feel happy showing off the things I make but I feel like such a novice. There is so much I don't know, so much that I want to learn.

I am stubborn and lazy. I don't have the drive to get off my high horse and DO SOMETHING!!!!

I feel like a hermit crab. I want to stay in my shell.

At least I found friends again. People who genuinely like me. This may help me on my path.

My sentences and paragraphs seem to be shrinking exponentially. I need to post more!!! I don't want to lose my ability to write!!! I will pledge to write at least once a week from now on!